Understanding The Sacrament Of Marriage

by Rev. Fr. Jude .J. Obiunu(Ph.D)

The sacrament of marriage is very central to the mission and life of the church. Understanding the sacrament of marriage and preparing adequately for it therefore is a necessary condition for meaningfully entering into the sacrament.

Marriage implies a commitment to live with another person in such a way that he or she decides that the first thing on the agenda is the life, happiness, the holiness of the other person. The good of the other person takes precedence even over the desires and dreams they have for themselves as individuals. And when that other makes the same decision, together the two embark on a whole new adventure. This adventure is a uniting, collaborative project which brings the two people together in a way that their individual differences, though still active are subsumed into one another by the grace of the Sacrament of marriage which unites and sustains the bond. This is the basic meaning of the Sacrament of Marriage. Marriage therefore means considering the well-being of the other person first before any other thing. The sacrament reveals and emphasis the religious aspect of the above commitment to one another. Besides the fact that there is a public dimension to marriage in which there is an outward sign of the act of giving one's self to the other, it is also a public statement about God. It reveals who God is and who God is to us. In the scriptures, the relationship between God and God's people is often described in terms of marriage. The early Christians, reflecting on Christ's love for us, also used this image. Christ and the church embrace in mutual love and self-giving, even as do husband and wife(Ephesians 5:21-33). "For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother, and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a great mystery, and I am applying it to Christ and the church"(Ephesians 5:31-32).

The sacrament of marriage joins the spouses to the self-giving love of Christ the Bridegroom for the Church, His Bride(Eph. 5:25-32) by making them the image of, and sharers in this love. It makes married couples give praise to the Lord. It sanctifies their conjugal union and the life of the Christian faithful who celebrate it, and gives rise to the Christian family(the domestic church). Therefore, the sacrament is celebrated and lived in the heart of the new covenant, that is the paschal mystery. It is Christ, the Bridegroom(Matt 9:15), who is the source of its energies. Therefore, Christian couples and families are neither isolated nor alone.

For Christians, marriage, which has its origin in God the creator, also implies a real vacation to a particular state and a life of grace. In order to be brought to its maturation, this vocation requires adequate, particular preparation and a specific part of faith and love, all the more so because this vocation is given to a couple for the good of the church and society. This has all the meaning and strength of a public commitment made before God and society that goes beyond individual limits.

The sanctity and nature of marriage therefore requires that those going into marriage should be adequately prepared. So many people prepare for wedding but do not prepare for the sacrament of matrimony. Preparation for wedding ends with the wedding reception, while preparation for marriage ends with the end of marriage either by death or by some other causes. Preparation for marriage becomes an indispensable aspect of the marriage life.

Preparation means a thorough process of education for married life which must be considered in the totality of its values. Preparation is educating for the respect and care for life which, in the sanctuary of families, must become a real and proper culture of human life in all its manifestations and stages for those who are part of the people of life and, for life. The very reality of marriage is so rich that it first requires a process of sensitization so that the engaged will feel the need to prepare themselves for it.

The word of God stresses that marriage for Christian spouses implies a response to God's vocation and the acceptance of the mission to be a sign of God's vocation and the acceptance of the mission to be a sign of God's love for all the members of the human family, by partaking in the definitive covenant of Christ with the church. Therefore, spouses become cooperators with the Creator and Saviour in the gift of love and life. Hence, Christian marriage preparation can be described as a journey of faith which does not end with the celebration of marriage but continues throughout family life. Therefore, our perspective does not close with marriage as an act, at the moment of its celebration, but is on-going. This is why preparation is also a "special opportunity for the engaged to rediscover and deepen the faith received in baptism and nourished by their Christian upbringing. In this way they come to recognize and freely accept their vocation to follow Christ and to serve the Kingdom of God in the married state"


To be continued...